


Smoke.

by bend_me_shape_me



Series: one-word prompts [22]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Canon-Typical Violence, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-08
Packaged: 2019-09-14 07:09:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16908441
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bend_me_shape_me/pseuds/bend_me_shape_me
Summary: Hello, this one is one of my favourite ones, not only of the series but like of everything I have written. As always thanks for reading and you can find meon tumblr!





	Smoke.

There was smoke everywhere, so dense Dean couldn't see anything but he could still hear the screams. The demon was dead but he set the building on fire with the victims, those who were dead and those who were still alive, inside. But there was a scream that he could hear over all the others, the one of that girl they were too late to save, reaching the demon on time to see him breaking her neck. That scream he will never forget.

He couldn't breathe, he couldn't see, he was alone, he was going to die here. He thought he heard the distant sirens of fire trucks before fainting, he prays for Cas to save his brother.

That was two days ago, now he is laying in his bed, under all the blankets he could find in his closet. The moments after the fire are confusing and blurry memories for him. He remembers a couple of arms carrying him outside, then an ambulance and Cas driving the impala. Sam was okay, he was okay and Cas too, he had even helped rescuing people after making sure Dean and Sam were okay.

He remembers taking a shower and getting in bed just after getting back home, and he is still there. He doesn't have the energy to leave the room. He keeps seeing her, dying in front of them, new material for his already vivid and complete nightmares. Everytime he closes he sees she is there, there is fire, pain, it's like being in hell all over again, he sees what he did while being there, what he did being a demon.

And there is smoke, so much smoke.

His eyes sting, he doesn't know when he fell asleep but he guesses he couldn't fight exhaustion anymore. 

He can't breathe, he can't breathe, he coughs and coughs, he taste smoke in his mouth, it's everywhere. 

“Dean.”

He knows that voice, but he can't answer, there is too much smoke, he can't breathe, he only coughs.

“Dean, wake up, Dean, please.” Cas’ voice sounds worried, scared.”Dean” He finally opens his eyes, trying to breathe, he can't.” Look at me.” His eyes focus and he is met by a pair of wide blue eyes, full of sorrow.”Dean, breathe, slowly.” He feels a warm hand against his cheek and another one that picks his own pressing it against warm skin, he tries to follow the steady rise and fall of the chest under his hand. He calms a little bit, leaning into the touch on his face, seeking comfort.”Shhh, Dean, it's okay, I'm here. That's it, breathe with me, you are doing great.” The blue eyes turn to look at someone else, standing at the doorway. Dean eyes stay glued to Cas’ face, still trying to regain his breath.”It's okay Sam, I will stay with him, go back to sleep.” He listens to Cas voice, eyes closed, he feels a little bit better. “ Dean, look at me,” he opens his eyes again and Cas hands him a glass of water,”drink slowly.” Dean empties the glass, taking a deep breath. ”Come on.” Cas makes him get out of bed and leads him to the kitchen, holding his hand tightly all the way. Dean sits down at the table, watching Cas moving around the kitchen, he is only wearing a pair of sweatpants. Cas finally sits down with him, setting two steaming mugs of hot chocolate in front of them. 

They are quiet for a while, Dean sips slowly and Cas does the same, getting a nice chocolate mustache.

‘’Dude,’’ he hands him a napkin,’’clean your face.’’ Cas wips at his upper lip with an amused look.’’Cas, thank you. Not only for tonight, for saving us too, for everything. I don’t know what I would do without you.’’ Cas holds his hand.

‘’Do you want to talk?’’ He is going to say no, he doesn’t want to burden Cas with his problems.’’It’s okay if you don’t want to, but you can, Dean. I’m here for you.’’ Dean nods, thankful, and he starts speaking after a while.

‘’The nightmares aren’t anything new for me, you know? But these days, they have been so strong, like I was in hell again.’’ He shivers, Cas wraps an arm around his shoulders, and Dean reclines against him, he didn’t notice how cold he was, how much he needed a comforting touch.’’And I keep seeing her, that poor girl, we didn’t save her Cas, we were right there and we couldn’t do anything but stare.’’ He sighs deeply.

‘’Dean, I can’t erase the past, I hate the circumstances in which we met, I suffer because I know you suffer too, I will do whatever you need me to do to help you. And I know you want to save anyone, Dean, you are a hero.’’ Dean huff, but Cas keeps going anyway.’’You have saved so many lives, you have stop things that would have end with the world if they had the chance, you killed the demon, and he isn’t going to hurt anyone else, we saved everyone that was in that building, I know it hurts, but you fight tooth and nail to save people everyday, you risk your own life, all to make possible innocent people can come back home and live their lives. You can’t say whatever you want, but you are a great man Dean. It will pass, like many other times before, the nightmares will leave you rest, you will save more lives, and you will understand that you are human, that you aren’t going to be able to save everyone.’’ Dean nods, he isn’t going to try and speak pass the lump in his throat, he really wants to believe he deserves all those words. ‘’You should go to sleep, Dean.’’ Cas fingertips brush the dark shadows under his eyes. 

Dean doesn’t want to be alone, he doesn’t want to go to his bed again, but Cas is right, he should get some rest. Cas gets up and puts away the mugs. He stares at Dean when the hunter doesn’t make a movement to leave the kitchen. He wants to be with Cas, he knows it sounds clingy and probably Cas would love to be doing any other thing that deal with Dean. Part of him knows he is wrong, Cas enjoys his time with Dean as much as Dean does, but he can’t ask him to do this. Cas isn’t going to judge him, he wants to help Dean, but he can’t if Dean doesn’t tell him what he needs.

‘’I can’t be alone tonight, Cas.’’ _I need you with me_ , he adds in his mind. Cas smiles softly at him, tending a hand in his direction, Dean takes it and gets up, Cas wraps his arms around him and Dean returns the hug, hiding his face against Cas’ neck. They are touching so much tonight, and he needs to know, if this is a friend comforting a friend or if it’s something more, if Cas feels the same. There will be time for that tomorrow, now he lets Cas carry him to his room, it’s okay, Dean didn’t want to come back to his own bedroom.

They don’t talk, like they are afraid of breaking the weird calm that has settled, Dean is too tired to think about how he is sleeping with his best friend, he just gets comfortable, relaxing when Cas embraces him.

“ You always raise me from hell, Cas.” He jokes weakly. Cas kisses his forehead. Dean can feel sleep claiming him and he hopes the nightmares give him a break for a couple of hours, at least he knows he isn't going to be alone when they disturb his sleep.

“ Always, Dean, always. You deserve to be saved.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, this one is one of my favourite ones, not only of the series but like of everything I have written. As always thanks for reading and you can find me on tumblr!


End file.
